Monthly Archives: June 2013

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 18, 2013

Posted under

Movies

Comments

Leave a comment

Night of the Ghouls (1959)

Image

ImageImageImage

Now this is what I’m talking about.  Why is Night of the Ghouls “undoubtedly” the worst film ever made?  In terms of technical skill it had no egregious continuity errors, non-matching night/day shots or wobbling tomb stones and the actors do reasonably good jobs within the context of the kind of movie they are in.  Night of the Ghouls has its problems and it’s certainly a bit more odd than a lot of the films from the era but Edward D. Wood, Jr. is still no worse than a lot of the other “bad movie” directors.

I guess the biggest “red herring” in Night of the Ghouls is the hilariously pointless detour to the shots of the teens hanging out and fighting; for a moment I thought it was going to turn into one of those “teenage monster” movies.  But nope, Wood never revisits the juvenile delinquency theme.  Instead the film turns into an enjoyable ghost movie involving a medium, a goofy cop, a cute as hell assistant, some police procedure, some shoot ’em up action, a neat twist ending and Tor Johnson wearing effectively grotesque horror make up.

Oh, one other thing; Criswel.  What’s cool is that while Criswel introduces the story by breaking the fourth wall from his coffin and becomes the narrator and later plays a role within the narrative, as if he’s telling you the story in flashback.  The story starts when a hysterical (both definitions of the word) old couple comes into a police station to report the siting of a ghost; this part gets confusing because apparently they saw the White Ghost (Valda Hansen) who didn’t exist in the main body of the story so clearly this is in flashback.  Also a teenage couple gets killed by the Black Ghost (Jeannie Stevens), who roams the graveyard at night.  Police Lieutenant Daniel Bradford (Duke Moore) goes to investigate and ends up at, what I guess is the same building that functioned as the laboratory in Wood’s previous film Bride of the Monster.

Thus Night of the Ghouls is sort of a sequel or continuation.  The building is now a creepy house where Dr. Acula (Kene Duncan) is a medium who is assisted by “The White Ghost” who I never heard addressed by any other name.  They hold a creepy seance where they have skeletons sitting in chairs and things float in the air and a corpse that speaks to the living; it’s actually pretty cool.  Most of the rest involves searching through corridors and investigating weird stuff.

But I’ll tell you this and it’s very important: if you watch this movie thinking, “haha, oh Ed Wood, haha” then you can easily write it off as a joke but if you suspend your disbelief and actively watch it like you would anything else, it’s got some neat twists which I’m not going to spoil!  Wood pulls off a creepy trick during one of the investigative sequences where the detective looks into a closet and sees a manikin, looks away then looks back and the thing is smiling at him!  It’s actually pulled off really well!

Do you want me to find problems with Night of the Ghouls?  Okay, fine.  Aside from the aforementioned pointless juvenile delinquent sequence, there’s an extremely annoying cop named Kelton (Paul Marco) who I guess is supposed to be funny when he acts like a buffoon the entire time.  Also that hysterical old couple are obviously not “trained” actors.  But who cares?  That’s all nitpicking nonsense!  Night of the Ghouls is pretty good so don’t be a hater and check it out.

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 17, 2013

Posted under

Pink Fairies

Comments

1 Comment

Pink Fairies

Image
special introductory paragraph
Never Never Land
Mandies and Mescaline Round at Uncle Harry’s
What a Bunch of Sweeties
Kings of Oblivion
Live at the Roundhouse 1975
Previously Unreleased EP
Kill ’em and Eat ’em
Pleasure Island
No Picture

The Pink Fairies were an offshoot of the Deviants and emerged from the same bohemian/anarchist Ladbroke Grove scene from which Hawkwind, the Edgar Broughton Band and a whole bunch of other “anti-establishment” rock bands came from.  I used ironic quotes because, for all the press the Pink Fairies received for being anarchists, they sure as hell didn’t sing about this topic or even use social satire like the Deviants did.  I’m aware they set up free gigs and were considered a band of the people but, when your most popular song is about a certain male organ, it’s hard to really think of them sticking it to the man. But I like ’em though and isn’t that what counts?

Never Never Land – Polydor – 1971

never never land

The original lineup for the Fairies consisted of former Deviants members Paul Rudolph (guitar/vocals), Duncan Sanderson (bass) and Russell Hunter (drums) along with former Pretty Things drummer John “Twink” Alder as a second drummer, I guess.  I never quite understood that.  His presence isn’t really felt and it doesn’t really seem to matter but, he’s there and that’s that.

So the biggest thing that got me interested in the Pink Fairies is their direct connection to Hawkwind and Motorhead.  But they certainly sound nothing like the former and only vaguely like the latter.  For better or worse, they’re just a solid rock band.  Or if you like parallels, they’re the MC5 to Hawkwind’s Stooges.  If the Stooges were the innovative, weird ones, then the MC5 just played really good rock ‘n’ roll.  But, since when was making solid rock music a crime?

And the first Pink Fairies album is loaded with solid rock tunes.  The primary styles seem to alternate between crunchy Slade and Mott the Hoople style hard rock and Floyd-style laziness.  Rudolph shows off his various tricks; dirty, distorted guitar riffs, normal, non-distorted riffs, phased psychedelic solos and pretty acoustic melodies.  What among those do you think is my favorite approach?  The ace rockers are “Do It”, “Say You Love Me”, “Teenage Rebel” and “The — HEY, WAIT A MINUTE!!!  “The Snake” isn’t on the album?!  What, arrgggglll!!!!

Incidentally, these are the lyrics to “The Snake”, the greatest Pink Fairies song and one of the greatest rock tunes ever, a locomotive of pre-punk, aggressive riffing and fast drumming!  It was later covered by Tank!!!

I’m gonna tell you baby, don’t try to hide, don’t try to hide
That snake just wants to come inside
Here comes the snaaaaaaake!!

Viva la revolution!!!

I like this album; it’s got some great songs on it.  “Teenage Rebel” is a real headbanging song about being an outcast baby!  A rebel!  You don’t want to run into this guy in the streets!  He’ll rough you up with this angry long hair and motorcycle jacket!

Although I don’t know why this tough, angry rock band would want to put “War Girl” and “Never Never Land” back to back considering how these songs are so laid back.  That’s no way to keep the speed snorting long hairs from falling asleep, is it?  Both are good songs but they just seem to slow down the momentum.  Also “Never Never Land” sounds more like a Deviants than a Pink Fairies song.

I should mention somewhere that “Track One, Side Two” is accompanied by piano, “War Girl” has some bongos on it and “Uncle Harry’s Last Freak Out” crams a bunch of riffs and solos together for 11 straight minutes and sounds as though someone forgot to fade song earlier.

What a Bunch of Sweeties – Polydor – 1972

Pink-Fairies-What-a-Bunch-of-Sweeties

Well Twink is gone.

The album starts with a joke about the Pink Fairies playing on URANUS!!! Hahahahahha!!!

Of the the group’s three studio albums, What a Bunch of Sweeties is my least favorite.  It still has some decent material but some of these songs are either too long, not that great or just consist of goofing around.  For instance opening track “Right On, Fight On” is a solid piece of early 70s fist pumping, major chord rock but does it need to be eight minutes long?  Then the very next song “Portobello Shuffle”, although not a bad song, is just 12 bar boogie rock, no different from ZZ Top or AC/DC’s cover of “School Days.”  Listen to all three back to back and tell me differently!

Okay, now “Marilyn” is what I’m talkin’ ’bout!  That’s the kind of song I want to hear; a dirty, mean, hard rockin’ tune with angry, hoarse singing and crunchy guitar riffs!

Oh god, the next song is a novelty country tune called “The Pigs of Uranus”!!!  We’re halfway through the album!!!  Will all you Ladbroke Grove loving anarchists please tell me what you see in this band?!

We’re onto side two.  Now, I know this is a very condescending thing to say but the second best piece of music on this entire album is lifted from the surf guitar classic “Walk Don’t Run.”  The actual song it’s used in is also called “Walk Don’t Run” and is a nine minute epic that has other parts that are okay.  But, would this song be nearly as good without the classic riff played through a dirty fuzz tone?  I don’t think so!  That leaves us with three more songs…

I’m getting tired of this; why are so many songs on this album so long?  “I Went Up, I Went Down” is another eight minute Floyd style song with psychedelic effects on the guitar.  “X-Ray” is okay, I guess… but, what do I see here?  It’s “I Saw Her Standing There”!!!  So there you go, they redeemed an otherwise not so great album with a Beatles cover!

I’ve read tons about these guys being a “proto-punk” band and being all revolutionary and playing free gigs and stuff but I don’t get it.  Are you sure we’re listening to the same band?  I like dumb, early 70s hard rock!  But why is this group placed on a pedestal as something apart from that?  Actually I can guess… but is it right to have a “righteous” reputation just because you know a bunch of cool people?

Kings of Oblivion – Polydor – 1973

Pink-Fairies-Kings-Of-Oblivion

The Larry Wallis album!  Paul Rudolph left, and the band recorded one okayish single with guitarist Mick Wayne(both sides of it are included as bonus tracks on the CD reissue), but he was gone soon after, and the band recruited former UFO guitarist Larry Wallis.  Larry Wallis is one of those underrated, “journeyman” musicians, kinda like Phil Manzanera (not his style, just his reputation), who have their fingerprints on a handful of really freakin’ great, though thoroughly underrated albums in the pantheon of rock.  And whaaat an album!  No acoustic songs, no novelty nonsense, just seven jammin’ hard rock songs, which bounce back and forth from Alice Cooper-style garagey hard rock, proto-punk, longer, jammier tunes and even a couple of sleazy boogie-rock numbers.

The album starts with “City Kids”, the second best Pink Fairies song behind “The Snake.”  It’s so good, in fact, that Wallis would take it with him when he joined Lemmy in Motorhead, and Lemmy liked it so much that, even after Wallis abruptly left Motorhead, they recorded it as the b-side to their “Motorhead” single.  Just a bunch of no good street kids hangin’ ’round; probably cut their long hair and became punks a couple years later.  The only other fast song on Kings of Oblivion is the instrumental “Raceway”, which, according to the liner notes, became an instrumental by accident.

“When’s the Fun Begin?” and “Chromium Plating” are both enjoyable songs with cool, angry riffs and lots of soloing; the latter has a bunch of wicked hammer on solos and endless drum rolls that are super fun to air drum to.  And “I Wish I Was a Girl” might seem a bit long at 10 minutes; but, if I have to hear a bunch of guitar solos, it might as well be from a pro like Wallis.  Is he admitting to being a sissy in the song? “As a streetfighter I don’t make it/ when the trouble starts, I can’t take it/ the site of blood don’t turn me on/when the trouble starts, I’m long gone.”  “Chambermaid” and “Street Urchin” are about a couple of loose women that you wish you knew.

Now what do you think of your revolutionaries?  I’m not kidding though; I’ve struggled to figure out why this group is placed on a counter culture pedestal when their music isn’t all that extraordinary and their lyrics don’t go beyond standard rock topics…

In a couple years Wallis would join Lemmy in an early incarnation of Motorhead and take some of his best songs with him!

Live at the Roundhouse 1975 – Big Beat – 1982

live_roundhouse

This is a live album taken from a Pink Fairies reunion gig that took place on July 13, 1975 at the Roundhouse.  The lineup for the gig is Paul Rudolph, Larry Wallis, Duncan Sanderson, Russell Hunter and Twink.  The album only contains five numbers.  Apparently they performed more but the sound wasn’t good enough on the rest of them.

The only two songs featured on this collection that come from the studio catalog are “City Kids” and “Uncle Harry’s Last Freakout.”  The other three are covers of “Lucille”, “Waiting for the Man” and “Going Down.”  Unsurprisingly the recording is bootleg quality and monophonic sounding but all the instruments are audible enough.

As far as the performances go, “City Kids”, while still great, seems a little sluggish.  “Waiting for the Man” is played like a straightforward rock song and needlessly extended to 10 minutes by guitar solos.  “Lucille” and “Going Down” are performed pretty close to their original 12 bar rock ‘n’ roll and blues rock originals, if a bit harder and “Uncle Harry’s Last Freakout” is 12 minutes long and filled with more needless guitar solos.  The group seems in good spirits and having fun but that live excitement somehow doesn’t transcend the recorded divide.  Or I just find the endless jamming kind of boring.

It’s probably obvious that I’m not super excited about listening to or talking about this release.  There’s not much else to say about it.

Previously Unreleased EP – Big Beat – 1984

previously_unreleased

Featuring Larry Wallis and Duncan Sanderson with new drummer George Butler, Previously Unreleased wasn’t initially intended to be a Pink Fairies release.  To me it makes no difference since the band playing on this record is 2/3 of the one that played on Kings of Oblivion but I guess Larry Wallis didn’t feel like a Pink Fairy, ya know?

Previously Unreleased contains six brand new tunes and, just like the material that Wallis presented to the original Motorhead, these are basic rock tunes; remember the second Slaughter and the Dogs album Bite Back?  They’re like that.  These are hard rock tunes that lean on pub, glam and even a little bit of punk.

“Can’t Find the Lady” especially fits this punk/pub hybrid with 12 bar rockin’ and rollin’.  And that’s about it!  I honestly can’t think of anything else to say about these songs.  They’re not remarkably distinct but they’re not terrible either.  Wallis plays a mean guitar; he solos but doesn’t solo too much and the songs aren’t too long.
Don’t fret! Reviews for the rest of the catalog coming soon!

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 16, 2013

Posted under

Movies

Comments

1 Comment

The Girl Who Returned (1969)

ImageImage

ImageImageImage

Do not take the score of 3 out of 4 as some sort of recommendation.  If you are not up to watching a slow, grainy 16mm film which was made for $2000, The Girl Who Returned  can seem interminable in spite of its 62 minute running time.  This is Lloyd Kaufman’s debut feature film but if you were expecting a precursor to Troma, you’re out of luck.  Actually I take that back; even in a nudity free, oddball student film, Kaufman still managed to squeeze in some sex.

But let’s start from the beginning.  I became a huge Troma fan around 1999 when I was an obnoxious teenager and, as I was engorging the standards like The Toxic Avenger and Tromeo and Juliet – and basically anything that was gory, horrific and exploitative – I never in my life imagined I’d get to see this film.  I thought it would be a forgotten relic, only mentioned as a learning experience in Lloyd Kaufman’s autobiography.  So thank you Youtube for existing.  It is fascinating to see this time capsule film; a grainy window into college life circa 1968.  That’s not what the film is about mind you, but, in some ways it can seem like a glorified home movie.  I know that’s an insulting statement so let me get to the review before I dig myself a bigger hole.

The Girl Who Returned begins with a group of college girls doing calisthenics on a football field while a male announcer informs the watcher that the Olympic games between Luxemburg and Mongolia will soon commence.  This is apparently code for the females and the males.  The two conflicting states hold Olympic games every four years to determine who is better.  The rest of the narration is taken up by a female and the actual plot concerns Lucy (Gretchen Herman) being trained by her coach, Geneva (Beverly Galley) to become the best runner or something.  Not very much happens until Lucy breaks free and goes to “Mongolia” in hopes of restoring a “golden age” between the two states.  When she meets some “Mongolians”, they mock her.  That is until she encounters a friendly one – a nice guy – and the two walk around, hold hands and eventually sleep together.  Don’t get any ideas!  The sex is presented tastefully.

Back in Luxemburg the Olympic games take place and well, I guess I shouldn’t spoil the whole film.  But basically there is some sort of vague message being sent about how the supposed “golden age” is as much of a chance occurrence as a one time pickup.  The point is that Kaufman pulls together some neat tricks in order to make you feel like you’re watching a narrative and not just a goofy collection of shots.  Indeed some scenes seem painfully long and if there wasn’t a narrator to string the plot together, it would make no sense.  Well, I don’t know…. maybe I should test that theory and watch it without the narrator.

The acting is about what you’d expect from a silent student film.  The actions are exaggerated but it’s not to the point of annoyance.  There also seem to be some lesbian overtones between Lucy and Geneva or maybe my perverted mind imagined that.  I dunno.  It’s a neat idea if not the most actively entertaining film in world.

Also, in true Tromatic sense, Kaufman’s artistic aspirations were a bit too ambitious; he attempted to make the film equivalent of John Cage’s use of silence by putting black screens between various shots which resulted in the film’s watchers complaining that the projector was malfunctioning.

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 15, 2013

Posted under

Movies

Comments

Leave a comment

Panic in Year Zero (1962)

Image

ImageImageImage

I was debating between 3 and 4 but, you know me; even the slightest hint of sentimentality or people being decent to each other and down goes the grade.  I’m being slightly facetious here.  I like nice people who don’t hurt others; I just don’t like when films tell me to be a good person.

With that said Panic in Year Zero is a very entertaining “self preservationist”, end of the world movie.  The obvious influence is Roger Corman’s 1956 film The Day the World Ended but clearly the post-apocalyptic theme is pretty common in science fiction these days.Back then, however, with atomic fear right around the corner, the film was also very topical.

Also, it should be known, that I love cold war cinema a lot!  A lot lot!  I love watching Commies invade the U.S. and watch people fighting back.  And I know, it’s not politically correct to say this but I love anti-Commie propaganda.  I don’t believe it, mind you.  I just enjoy watching Jack Webb telling you how to spot a Commie.  But I especially love atomic bomb mushroom clouds that result in gross mutations.

Panic in the Year Zero is a very entertaining movie from actor turned director Ray Milland.  Ray Milland is great!  He’s hammy as all hell and old fashioned but so much fun!  How fun you ask?  Look at his IMDB photo!
milland_2

The story begins when a fishing trip is cut short by several hydrogen bomb blasts that set L.A. ablaze and set the L.A. area’s population into panic.  Thinking on his feet Harry Baldwind (Millan) leads his family, consisting of Rick (Frankie Avalon) the son, Ann (Jean Hagen) the wife and Karen (Mary Mitchell) the daughter, to a cave hideout in some far away town, where they fend for their lives.

On their way they pick up supplies and fight with people. Among those who they fight are various local folks who are also fending for themselves and a trio of juvenile delinquents turned homicidal maniacs and rapists.  Basically the film’s premise exists on the fact that in situations such as these, we are forced to fend for ourselves and not care for others.  The film’s entire moral crux is displayed in this exchange, following Rick’s almost nailing one of the delinquents, Carl (Richard Bakalyan, who plays in The Delinquents if you can believe that!) and then says, “but Dad, I could have blown his head off!”  In response Harry says, “you’re not supposed to like killing people!  You’re just supposed to do it for self defense!”  Right on, pops!

Indeed the majority of the of the good stuff is given to Milland and Avalon.  Unfortunately the female characters are entirely one-dimensional.  Ann, the wife/mom is constantly trying to derail their progress under the notion that you’re supposed to be kind to people always.  This got REALLY frustrating!  The reason Avalon missed one of the thugs with his shotgun blast is because his mom pushed his gun away!  I was ready to reach into the screen and strangle her!  What are you thinking, lady?  Are you TRYING to get your family killed?  The daughter on the other hand just functioned as scenery; her only purpose was to be raped by one of the thugs only to be avenged later.  I suppose that would count as a spoiler.

Fortunately the wimpy female is balanced by a strong female character who can shoot guns, whew!  Milland might almost have been branded a sexist!  Her name is Marilyn and she’s played by Joan Freeman if you must know.  And that about covers it.

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 15, 2013

Posted under

Movies

Comments

Leave a comment

Young and Dangerous (1957)

Image

Image

Don’t you love the poster for this movie?  It’s similar to the one for The Explosive Generation.  You’ve got a male character who looks as though he’s trying to force his will onto a female and then you’ve got some extra pictures of teens fighting, another male forcing his will upon a female and what looks like teens hanging out or something.  Once again the film’s title and poster are a complete lie.  Young and Dangerous is another melodramatic soap opera where the teens are nice people who are slightly misled and just need some guidance.

It had such potential too!  The movie begins with a “rumble” sequence in which a jealous ex starts a fight with the film’s main character over a girl before the cops break it up, leaving you with such hope… but alas, the movie very quickly degenerates into long, boring scenes of parents talking to teens, teens talking to teens and parents talking to parents; in groups, one on one, over the phone, just talk, talk, talk.  About what?  Well, apparently the film’s main character, Tommy Price (the incredibly good looking Mark Damon who was in Corman’s The Young Racers among many others) is a “bad kid” with no direction in life and a “reputation.”

When there aren’t scenes of people talking there are romantic montages and two goons trying to pick up ladies who hopefully aren’t “dogs.”  But let me start from the beginning. After the “rumble” sequence Tommy Price makes a bet with his two buddies Rock (William Stevens) and Stretch (Jared Barclay who resembles a young Dennis Hopper, but taller) that he can get with Rosemary (Lili Gentle).  Price takes her out in his car, makes a move on her, she jumps out and then, for no reason at all, a cop sees them and takes them in even though they didn’t commit any discernible crime.

After the “traumatic” questioning in the police station, Rosemary’s parents make it clear that she is not to see “that boy, Tommy.”  Henceforth she violates this, they start falling in love, he starts realizing there is more to life than “jazz, women and cars” and then he gets in another fight with the bad guys from the film’s opening.  The fight sequences is about the only other redeeming part of the film.  It’s actually pretty bloody!  Though it is amusing that Rosemary’s jealous ex and his boys look about 40 but, suspension of disbelief, I guess.

I love juvenile delinquent films; some of my faves include Robert Alman’s The Delinquents and Roger Corman’s Teenage Doll.  I’m sure I can name a dozen more.  But so many of them seem to shirk on the good stuff in hopes of “sending a message.” Chances are pretty strong though that I’ll continue to watch these and be fooled.  Next up: High School Hellcats!

 

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 14, 2013

Posted under

Movies

Comments

1 Comment

Blackenstein (1973)

blackenstein_1973

ImageImageImage

Please realize that my giving Blackenstein (a.k.a. Black Frankenstein) a grade of three out of four iron crosses is more of a reflection of my horrible taste in films, than of the film’s actual quality. The customary complaints of budgetary restraints, poor acting, bad dialogue, plot holes, unexplained character motivation and technical issues don’t even begin to describe how bad this movie is.  But one thing that really surprised me was how much gore it had!  I thought it was going to be tame like Blacula, which is a PG rated American International release, but, oh no!  “The monster” goes around ripping out organs and pulling off limbs, and there is some full frontal nudity.  So the film definitely earned its R rating.

The plot begins when a cute little doctor/nurse/whatever named Winnifred (Ivory Stone) begins assisting Dr. Stein (John Hart) in his makeshift mad scientist lab, full of cheap props, Tesla coils and things that create lightning for no reason.  Yet this is supposed to be his “state of the art” medical facility where he uses “experimental” techniques to help people.  Mind you, he IS a good guy and not a mad scientist; he apparently is actually helping his two patients, a 90 year old woman who wants to maintain a youthful appearance and a Russian amputee to whom he attached new limbs.

Anyway Winnifred tells him about her lover/fiance (we talked through that part so I didn’t get what the official title was), Eddie (Joe De Sue), who lost his arms and legs in Vietnam.  Stein agrees to try an experimental procedure to give him new limbs from recently deceased corpses.  Everything would have gone according to plan if not for Stein’s other assistant, Malcomb (Roosevelt Jackson), who, out of desire and jealousy, screwed with the DNA formula and, as a result, turned Eddie into a monster that goes around killing people.

Uh, okay so, plot holes?  They keep Eddie locked up, I think?  Yet he manages to make nightly rendezvous where he finds random victims (and one not so random bigoted male nurse!).  They are all unmotivated and completely unnatural.  His victims incude a middle aged couple and their dog, the girl who left her date’s presence after he was too forward with her, the couple outside the nightclub and so on and so forth.

Oh yeah!  I should mention that there is a pointless nightclub scene.  You could argue that director William Levey was establishing locale but, for some reason we see a comedian Andy C perform minutes of his routine and a nightclub singer Carmello di Milo sing a number or two.  These are entertaining scenes for what they are, but they disrupt the flow of the film.  Not that this film has much flow, but hey!

Also, I wasn’t going to bitch about this too about continuity, but where the hell did he get that suit from?  First he’s in his prison – right, the doctor and nurse, for some reason keep their patient in a prison like cage – where he emerges wearing a suit!  A fucking suit!  I suppose they’re trying to keep with the Karloff’s monster but you know, they still didn’t answer where he got a suit from.  Oh and bullets don’t harm “the monster” but really sharp k-9s do, hint, hint….

The acting is mostly crap although there wasn’t much to work with.  John Hart and Ivory Stone do okay at their on dimensional parts but Roosevelt Jackson is hilariously bad!  His character stares and ogles his love interest with no subtlety at all!  The movie tries to show that he has romantic feelings for Winnifred, but he stares at her like a rapist, and I don’t think that was intentional.  Okay, later he does try to rape her, but I don’t think the director was employing the subtle technique of foreshadow.  In fact I’d say I don’t think he was thinking anything when he made Blackenstein aside from “yerp, gotta kill people and uh, have the monster walk and stuff and like, uhh…”

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 11, 2013

Posted under

Movies

Comments

Leave a comment

Scream Bloody Murder (1973)

ImageImage

ImageImageImageImage

I couldn’t decide which was the more lurid poster so I went with both.  I’d been looking forward to seeing Scream Bloody Murder (also known as Matthew, Claw of Terror and The Captive Female) for a while.  I had seen the trailer a number of times and boy did it look good!  Of course by good I mean, completely outrageous and devoid of anything resembling good taste.  And, to be honest, I’m a little surprised by the IMDB user comments, which claim that the movie was, among other things, boring.  It certainly wasn’t that!  I was torn though.

This may sound like a pretty lofty claim but during the movie, I kept thinking, “hey, there’s more to this than just a gross-out fest!”  Filmmaker Marc B. Ray probably would disagree but in making the female character likable and smart, Scream Bloody Murder almost felt like a strong woman film at times.  Or maybe I’m full of crap considering she was tied up quite often.  It just seemed that, unlike a lot of similar movies, you were legitimately on her side in her struggle as opposed to delighting in watching mindless chaos and violence.

First of all the pacing was a little strange.  I’ve seen the trailer for The Captive Female, so I was under the impression that the movie focused almost entirely on the two characters – the villain Matthew (Fred Holbert) and the heroine Vera (Leigh Mitchell) – in one of those tasteless “abducted women” exploitation films.  Maybe I had The Sinful Dwarf in mind.  I don’t know for sure.

The point I’m making is that Scream Bloody Murder is like two films in one.  The first half is pretty much just a slasher movie while the second is the disturbing dominance/submission thriller that the trailer was advertising.  Basically, what happens is that a little kid Matthew runs over his dad with a tractor, then loses his own hand to said tractor and is sent to the looney bin all during the credit sequence.  When the movie actually begins, he’s 19 years old and has a hook in place of his hand; I’m also positive that they had Norman Bates in mind for the character.  It’s a wonder how this character managed to feign sanity for so long considering how he immediately goes on a killing rampage starting with his mom and her new husband.

This is where it gets really crazy; he just kills tons of people on his trek from his hillbilly farm to L.A.  In the process he pictures every woman who is with a man as his mother.  The movie shows us what he sees before he kills people; it looks like a bad acid trip in which the screen gets really distorted and color and the women turn into hideous monsters.  So he kills them and the men they are with.

The tone and pace change when Matthew meets adorable, sassy, redheaded prostitute Vera.  I’m actually surprised people said the acting was bad.  I think she played the part with class and her role as the hooker wasn’t exploitative.  I suppose you could argue that Ray didn’t need to make her a prostitute in the first place.  But then, Matthew wouldn’t be able to complain about “all those men touching you.”

I feel like I’m giving away too much plot here but let’s just say to get Vera in the house – any house – he had to, ahem, get rid of its occupants; “sorry m’am but I’m going to need the house.”  Then the fun really starts!  Like I said the Vera character is intelligent, quick witted and likeable so the movie actually seemed to be about her struggle to free herself.  Furthermore, unlike a lot of these exploitation films, the villain doesn’t rape the victim or drug and sell her into white slavery.  Matthew’s intentions of taking Vera away from the prostitute lifestyle are essentially good, if not misguided.  But ultimately it’s Vera’s choice what she does with her life.  She even uses sex as a weapon against her captor.   Do you see where I’m going with this?  It seems Ray was trying to be a little more ambitious than your typical exploitation director.  On the other hand the Vera character was still tied up in a lot of scenes.

Bottom line is I really liked this movie and don’t understand why it gets a bad rep.  Let me rephrase that.  I don’t understand why people into this type of crap knock the movie so much.  The kill scenes were pretty predictable but then the plot soon had some twists and turns I wasn’t expecting.

But in case you really want to make sure it’s worth 4/4 iron crosses, here it is in its entirety!

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 11, 2013

Posted under

Coven

Comments

2 Comments

Coven

Image
special introductory paragraph
Witchcraft Destroys Minds and Reaps Souls
Coven
Blood on the Snow

What do you do when your bar band can’t get a deal?  You have to come up with some sort of gimmick.  And that gimmick was, of course, Satanism and witchcraft.  Coven weren’t the only band doing this stuff; there was Black Widow, Lucifer’s Friend and some Italian band I can’t think of off the top of my head.  Coven was a psychedelic rock band with some jazz and prog influence thrown in for good measure.  They often get compared with Jefferson Airplane but that’s probably only because of female lead singer Jinx Daweson.  Otherwise the comparison is as superficial as saying Led Zeppelin sounds like Black Sabbath.  The other members of Coven were Chris Neilsen (guitar), Rick Durrett (keyboards), Steve Ross (drums) and – I know everybody flips when they hear this even though it’s just a meaningless coincidence – Oz Osbourne (bass).  Keyboardist Rick Durrett would be replaced by John Hobbs at some point as well.  They made three albums and called it day.

Witchcraft Destroys Minds & Reaps Souls – Mercury – 1969

Image

The world must have been really different in 1969 if Witchcraft Destroys Minds & Reaps Souls was controversial enough that Mercury deleted the record shortly after its release.  It’s easily one of the most unintentionally funny albums you’ll ever hear and I can’t imagine anyone but the squarest of the square taking it seriously.

First of all, in spite of the relatively negative tone this piece is taking, I DO enjoy this album even if it’s for the wrong reasons.  The album is fun to listen to overall and certain songs like “Black Sabbath” and “Wicked Woman” are pretty catchy.  The musicians are on the entire time.  It’s just hard to really take a band seriously when the only things they sing about are Satanism, witchcraft, sacrifices and selling your soul.  But Steve Ross does some neat drum rolls and fills and both Chris Neilsen and Rick Durrett jam out on their respective axe and keyboard instruments.

The group also varies their approach from song to song.  The album’s tone is set with opening track “Black Sabbath” which utilizes eerie minor notes and “ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh” chants when describing a black mass.  While I understand that Dawson is trying to sound like some evil old English cult leader or something, her singing is actually pretty annoying.  She pronounces “them” as “themMM-ah” and uses soft “L” sounds that you would get when touching your tongue to the top of your mouth.  Fortunately she only uses this singing approach in two other songs.  One of those is “Coven in Charing Cross”, which, incidentally is also about a black mass and has (rolls eyes) the entire band chanting “they are seven/seven are they.”

But the other songs on the album don’t even attempt at creating a scary or evil mood.  They stick to the subject matter at hand but with an inappropriately gleeful tone.  “The White Which of Rose Hall” is a toe-tapping number about that voodoo/witchcraft enthusiast Annie Palmer from Montego Bay.  “Pact with Lucifer” tells the tale of a struggling farmer who sells his soul in order to get his crops to grow.  “Choke, Thirst, Choke” sounds way too happy to have lyrics like “choke, thirst, choke/devil we evoke.”  “For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge” actually has a swingin’ jazzy vibe to it!  The lyrics go “everything she touches dies”!  And the songs “Wicked Woman” and “Dignitaries from Hell” actually kind of rock!

But the biggest culprit on the album is “Satanic Mass.”  I’d heard about it before and, from what I read, I was totally expecting it to be some sort of experimental piece or ambient sound collage.  But no such luck.  It is actually a thirteen minute long recording of a satanic mass with no musical accompaniment.  Maybe some people found this crap scary but I find it about as exciting as you could expect from *hearing* people say a bunch of satanic mumbo jumbo for thirteen minutes.  And, if that gives you nightmares, then you need to get out more.

Coven – MGM – 1972

coven_st

The track “Washroom Wonder” begins with the sound of a flushing commode.

Well, they lifted the veil on this operation pretty quickly.  I guess they really were a mediocre bar band!  There is absolutely nothing connecting the second Coven album to the first.  And don’t think this is some sort of artistic progression, hell no!  See how the cover contains a photo of the band with their faces whited out and a black cat sitting in front of them?  Well that black cat meets mysterious, ghost face motif is a complete lie!  There is nothing dark on this album.  Aside from having the same name and personnel – though I think this one has the second keyboardist on it – Coven is like a completely different band.

They now play Southern rock; ya know, Black Oak Arkansas, Bob Seger, Lynyrd Skynyrd, southern rock!  Eight of the eleven were either written or co-written by guitarist Chris Neilsen and he loves playing those Grand Funk style blues riffs while the pianist hammer’s away on his boogie-woogie piano almost the entire time.  Like I said there is no darkness on the album.  Jinx Dawson sounds like a sassy, tough broad and seems to have added a Southern twang to her singing.  The song “Lonely Lover” even has a cowbell!  The album also detours briefly into sentimental 70s soft rock.  One of those is album opener “Nightingale” – complete with string arrangement – which really throws you for a loop since it neither continues the approach of the first album nor sounds like the rest of the second.  The other soft song is a cover of anti-war tearjerker “One Tin Soldier” from Billy Jack.  I guess it was their only hit.  I find the song a little too sappy to get into.

And that’s it!  There is nothing else to say about the album!  Actually, I take that back; they cover “Jailhouse Rock.”  Also one of the other members sings on some of these.  But, as far as the rest of it goes, this music could have been made by hundreds of other bands playing in local bars across the U.S. in front of the drunken hillbillies that enjoy this stuff.

Blood on the Snow – Buddah – 1974

blood_on_the_snow

This is getting rough…

Why are they putting an image of the devil on the cover of their album?  Blood on the Snow has NOTHING to do with the devil.  The worst thing is how misleading this album is!  The opening track “Don’t Call Me” is an energetic, major chord, hard rock song with the guitars pumped up in the mix and the piano mixed so low that it’s negligible.  While not a great song, I thought, just for the sake of this here review, I’d somewhat enjoy this record.

What a fuckin’ joke!  Every song that follows is either a boring 70s soft rock song with a string section or an equally boring ballad.  And I know what you’re going to ask.  What the hell is the difference?  Well, I suppose that’s pretty negligible as well.  Okay, they’re not ALL ballads.  “Hide Your Daughters” is another piano driven, southern rock tune with lightly distorted guitars and “down home” style singing and I suppose “Lost Without a Trace” is an attempt at an epic rock tune with a darker mood.  Also, don’t be fooled by the song titled “Easy Evil.”  It’s (eye roll) another southern rock song – woa it has a saxophone! – this album sucks.

You old people with shitty taste can argue that Jinx Dawson has a pretty yet untrained voice and that she sounds sexy/sassy but, I don’t need this bland, 70s FM nonsense!  The last song is the title track and it has loud guitars and… eh, never mind.

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 10, 2013

Posted under

New album reviews

Comments

2 Comments

Iggy and the Stooges – Ready to Die

Image

ImageImageImage(out of 5)

It’s all relative I suppose and you don’t need me to tell you that I like the new Stooges album because you can just go on youtube and listen to the whole thing for free.  But, hey, I just want to talk about the Stooges even though I very clearly said I wasn’t going to do that in my introduction essay thingy.  The Stooges are built into the DNA of my music taste.  If you don’t own The Stooges, Funhouse, Raw Power and the two to three albums worth of songs on unofficial releases like Open Up and Bleed, then you and I do not share the same world view and we should probably not run into each other on the street.

The Stooges brief career ended in 1974.  Several of Ig’s former band mates played on a few of his solo albums but it was made pretty clear a reunion wasn’t going to happen; especially after the insulting liner notes on the 1997 Raw Power CD reissue.  To quote – regarding the Asheton bros. – “those guys couldn’t organize a home aquarium without me.”  Ouch!  But somehow, in 2002, the Stooges were back!  Iggy was joined by Ron Asheton on guitar, Scott Asheton on drums, Minutmen/Firehouse bassist Mike Watt and even Steve McKaye on sax.  They did four songs for Iggy’s 2003 album Skull Ring.  Then they put out their poorly received “come back” album, The Weirdness in 2007.  Then, in 2009, Ron Asheton passed away.  Well, who else should take his spot than the guy who did so way back in 1972?  So, even though he hadn’t held a guitar in three decades, James Williamson rejoined and here we are, with a new Stooges album.  Only now it’s Iggy and the Stooges but, we know what’s up.

It’s good!  I  don’t think people were expecting to be blown away.  But I’m enjoying Ready to Die a lot more than I did The Weirdness (although, to be fair, I might have to just go back and listen to that one since it’s been six years).  First of all let’s make one thing clear.  Ron Asheton was the man!  His forceful, primitive guitar playing is the reason why punk rock exists.  But James Williamson is a stronger player.  That means a world of difference in 2013.  The Weirdness is full of basic, not too interesting garage rock riffs and we need some new tricks to tides us over!  I’m not saying this new album is particularly original.  All I’m saying is that Williamson just plays better melodies and more creative riffs.

It’s a garagey/punky hard rock album!  They aren’t breaking new ground and don’t try to.  Instead it’s just rock ‘n’ roll.  Um, lessee… I wouldn’t call the album particularly diverse but there a few different things going on here.  Williamson plays Stonesy melodies but, just like on Raw Power, his tone and approach are meaner and dirtier than Richards.  But this, in no way, has the same anger, fire and vitriol of Raw Power so don’t think it does just because I made a comparison to it.  I bitched on facebook about how I want the “I’m a streetwalkin’ cheetah with a heart full of NAPALM!!!” Iggy not this modern, crooning Iggy.  But, how can I demand such a thing from a 67 year old man?  The album scores on the fact that they know what they’re good at yet don’t make active efforts to copy the past.

Most of these songs are energetic rockers in which Iggy does what Iggy does; he makes no bones about his love for “those double Ds” – which is funny because I always pictured Iggy as an ass man who loves huge amazons but whatever – talks about having a shitty job and being sick of it and a bunch of other hilariously blunt admissions.  But the rockin’ tone is broken up with a trio of bittersweet, acoustic numbers – the strongest being album closer “The Departed”, which aside from incorporating the “I Wanna Be Your Dog” riff on acoustic guitar is just a really beautiful song about their dead friend.

Some of the songs also have sax and piano on them so that adds some dimension.  I’m sorry if this review isn’t the most in depth thing but I really don’t know what else to say about the album.  It has ten songs in 35 minutes.  Some of the song names are “Sex & Money”, “Dirty Deal”, “Unfriendly World” and “Gun”, so you know, they try to keep things grounded but not get TOO negative.  After all, they’re old and lived long lives and have had plenty of time to be angry at the world.  I dunno, whatever, it’s good.

 

Standard

Posted by

Posted on

June 10, 2013

Posted under

Movies

Comments

Leave a comment

I Eat Your Skin (1964)

Image

ImageImageImage

I am pretty sick of zombie movies but that’s because the only ones anyone ever makes are the stereotypical ones with hordes of flesh eating, walking dead who infect others by biting them and can be killed by a blow to the head.  But I wonder why it’s been such a long time since anybody has ever explored the classic voodoo zombies of the pre-Night of the Living Dead era?

Before Night of the Living Dead came out zombies were controlled by a voodoo master or some other similar force and just did the master’s bidding.  They pretty much acted like brain dead henchmen who would just as easily chop someone up with a machete as carry a bale of hay.  This topic fascinates me yet everyone just wants to watch crap like The Walking Dead.  And don’t tell me to see it.  I don’t have very much interest.  I saw the pilot and thought it was pretty standard stuff.  Maybe I’ll read the comic since I hear that’s all right.

Now then, one thing that boggled my mind about I Eat Your Skin is that there was no skin being eaten.  I suppose you could argue that the formula the doctor used ate people’s skin away but that’s a pretty ambitious reference to the title, I think.  More than likely it just sounded cool, especially on a double feature with I Drink Your Blood, which I have yet to see.

I Eat Your Skin is not a perfect movie but had enough of what I wanted to see that it worked for me.  The plot involves a womanizing writer named Tom Harris who is played by William Joyce who reminds me of a poor man’s Robert Ryan.  He, his publisher and his publisher’s wife take a sojourn to the Central American island called… Voodoo Island in hopes of inspiring Harris by surrounding him with voodoo culture.  The only thing Harris does is chase after Coral Fairchild (Betty Hyatt Linton) the daughter of the scientist Duncan Faichild (Dan Stapleton).  His conquests are then, often interrupted by the strange looking, bug-eyed, corpse like zombies, who attack people at random.

The acting is all hammy and hack.  The dialog is dubbed, making characters sound as if they are providing voice overs when they are actually just speaking.  There are attempts at comic relief which are horrible; often involving the publisher’s busty (their words, not mine!) wife who is incredibly annoying!  And the dialog is awful; unfunny one liners, corny fake insults, cheesy come-ons, etc.  Yet, I enjoyed it!  Writer/producer/director Del Tenney (known for such classics as The Curse of the Living Corpse and The Horror of Party Beach) does his best to entertain on a miniscule budget.  The movie is surprisingly violent for something that came out in 1964.  It’s not H.G. Lewis violent, mind you.  But there is a decapitation by machete, stabbings of various kinds, a torch to the face and slowly rotting skin.  But probably the best and most original event was when a zombie holding a box of explosives walks directly into the propeller of a helicopter causing it to explode.

Also the set pieces were neat looking.  I love this voodoo stuff so to me, temples with various masks and tropical jungle environments are all a plus.  I was disappointed that movie was in black and white.  Typically I don’t care about that however the movie should have been in color since it takes place in a tropical environment.  I really wanted to see the lush green of the trees and the multicolor masks and costumes that the natives used during the extensive voodoo ceremonies.  Oh well.  I also have issue with how the cheap, Alpha Video DVD release I watched it on, was formatted to the 1:33 ratio as opposed to being in widescreen.  It actually cut off parts of the credits.  Now how hard is it to release something in its correct aspect ratio even if you are a budget DVD company?