Chamber of Horrors (1966)

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More like Chamber of Borers, hahahahaha… uh, yeah.  Don’t be fooled by the poster.  There ain’t nothin’ terrifying about this movie and I’m not just talking in today’s standards.  According to the poster, a built-in audio-visual warning system is used to warn the audience when to turn away.  The irony is that there is nothing to turn away from.  The camera always cuts away from the violent part rendering the warning system rather useless.  Plus they tell you in advance that this will happen exactly four times during the course of a 99 minute film.  So what’s in the rest of the movie?

Chamber of Horrors doesn’t even deserve two iron crosses.  But, what can I say; it looks like a Hammer horror film and has a wax museum setting in some parts, some hilariously demeaning “slut shaming” dialogue and a really hot actress who I’d never seen before.  Other than that, the movie sucks.

It starts off promising when this crazy guy named Jason Cravatte (Patrick O’Neal) forces a priest to conduct a wedding between him and this dead woman at gun point.  Not having read the plot synopsis and going by the title of the film, I was under the impression that this Jason Cravatte character would conduct weird experiments and do strange things involving necrophilia in some chamber of horrors.

But, nope, that’s not the case at all.  Instead the movie quickly degenerates into a boring cat and mouse chase type thing as the womanizer and wax museam curator Cesar Danova (Anthony Draco) follow clues and leads to catch up with Jason Cravatte.

There are little plot points like Cravattes holing up in a New Orleans whore house before he is caught and escapes certain death by chopping his hand off and replacing it with an assortment of scary looking but underused weapons and then heads to Baltimore where he decides to give a good life to a struggling prostitute he meets in a bar in exchange for luring in all the people who were responsible for his murder conviction or something.  That was a run-on sentence

The point is is that, once again, the poster makes the movie seem scarier and more exciting than it really is.  There is almost no gore or suspense.  Again the wax museam was cool as these tend to be in movies like this but that’s about all there is to say about this clunker.

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