Rise of the Naziphobes

skinhead_leukemiaAll of a sudden, it’s become trendy to “punch Nazis.” Or is that punch “Nazis”? In either case, whether you put the scare quotes around “punch Nazis”, meaning that you only want to do it in a metaphorical sense, but wouldn’t want to face actual assault charges, or if you put them around “Nazis”, meaning that you would actually punch people that you suspect to be Nazis, it’s now hip and cool to randomly attack people based upon the dubious premise that they have views which the progressive and leftist establishment find icky.

For instance, check out this Rick and Morty gif:

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Now, in ANY other instance, this would be considered assault, and the people committing the assault would be criminally charged. If you were to brag to your friends that you did this, and they aren’t sociopaths, they would look at you like you’re the biggest asshole in the world, not as some sort of hero. Not to mention the fact that both of the aggressors in the gif are bigger and more muscular than the person they are assaulting. So, what makes it okay in this case? Well, we KNOW what SUPPOSEDLY makes it okay…

Apparently the notion of “pick on someone your own size” has been replaced with “pick on anyone at all if you think he or she has views you don’t like, especially if it’s some scrawny kid, who happens to have his head shaved and wears red suspenders (sorry, skinheads, I mean braces!) and combat boots and has a swastika on his t-shirt. Also make sure you have a second person with you, so he gets double the beating, and then hock loogies onto him to humiliate him some more.”

This sentiment has always simmered in the minds of most leftists, progressives, and even a few well-meaning, but utterly naive conservatives. But thanks to the recent events in Charottesville, VA, the “punch a Nazi” mania has boiled over, and now the internet is rife with “anti-Nazi” hysteria. Forget that, in a nation of 300,000,000 people, maybe 500 to 2,000 – a total of at most 0.0000006% of the U.S. population – of these so-called “Nazis” gathered in Charlottesville, VA to protest against the removal of the Robert E. Lee statue, getting clearance from local authorities and promise of protection from the ACLU. Some of the protesters wore offensive symbols on their t-shirts, shouted offensive slogans, and made offensive hand gestures, so their otherwise peaceful protest had to be stopped.

And it was. The governor declared a “state of emergency” and forced everyone to disperse, showing what happens to your freedom of speech when the stuff you want to say is not what the powers that be want to hear. One disgruntled, mentally unstable, Nazi obsessed freak was mad as hell and wasn’t going to take it anymore, so he decided to plow his car into a group of counter-protesters, who happened to members of Antifa; as a result, 19 people were injured, and one girl was killed.

Because of the cavalier attitude I had towards the girl who was killed, people accused me of having Nazi sympathies in spite being Jewish. But I honestly CANNOT feel bad for someone who joined a group whose entire purpose is to use violence to stop people from saying things they don’t like. Whether you want to call Antifa a Communist group or a Fascist group is irrelevant. Antifa fancy themselves crusaders against “hate speech”, “Fascism”, “Nazism”, and “white supremacy” and think that it’s okay to start riots, destroy property, and physically attack people in order to “crusade.” Or as human chihuahua Yvette Felarca’s group of anarchists calls itself, “by any means necessary.” The girl who was killed (I don’t know what her name is, and I don’t care) became a martyr to that cause, and now the fight is officially ON against this phantom “white supremacy.”

Do you consider a crazy guy driving into a group of Antifa protesters a form of “white supremacy”? I consider it a crazy guy driving into a group of Antifa protestors. And, as far as I checked, the girl who was killed was white. So, where is this “white supremacy”? I just see mental instability.

But now apparently SJWs, leftists, and all forms of the “perpetually righteous” see a battle ahead of them. Is the guy you just sucker punched a skinhead, or is he bald from chemotherapy? Who cares? Wasn’t that guy you just blinded with pepper spray wearing a red MAGA hat? Wasn’t he asking for it? What about the guy with the confederate flag on his truck or the guy with the iron cross on his t-shirt?

Does it matter? The fact is that all of these COULD be Nazis, and it’s better not to take any chances!

I mean, let’s be honest here; the Nazis have come out of the woodwork, and they are on the attack, sucka!

Nazis in my bed! Nazis in my head! Nazis in my hair! Nazis Nazis everywhere!

Here a Nazi! There a Nazi! Everywhere a Nazi Nazi!

See a Nazi? Punch him! See another Nazi? Punch him too! See a guy hanging out NEXT to a Nazi? Punch him EXTRA hard for not taking the initiative of punching the Nazi himself!

Oh, he didn’t even KNOW the guy and just happened to be standing next to him? Well, he STILL deserved it because he wasn’t LOOKING OUT for a potential Nazi, thus not taking an active stance against Nazis!

And for fuck’s sake, make sure the Nazis you punch are short, scrawny, and defenseless. You wouldn’t want to tangle with anyone who could actually defend himself, would you?

Then again, maybe you would, because then you have a chance at becoming a martyr if you survive the beating.

So remember, if someone has views, wears symbols, or says things you don’t like, he’s committing an act of violence against you, and that gives you the moral clearance to punch, kick, stab, gouge, mutilate and urinate all over him.

Just make sure you enjoy “punching Nazis”, because the more Nazis you punch today, the more you’ll have to punch tomorrow.

Savage Hippie Episode 35 -Milo Yiannopoulos Vs. Yvette Felarca: Cage Match

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Pretty clever name, huh? Bound to get us tons of google hits, right? Some guy from the BBC emailed me a few weeks ago with a message that went something like, “cor blimey, chip chip cheerio, thanks for leaving the crown, ya bloody cunt, but I stumbled upon your bloody blog, and I would like to ask you some questions about the AltRight”, and rather than saying, “okay, shoot me some questions”, I said, “you should check out our podcast first.” He responded with, “fine, ya bloody cunt, I din’t wanna talk to a Paki-bashing racist cunt like you anyway.” And so, I blew my chances at stardom.

HOWEVER, in order to rectify the situation, I deliberately named the episode with the sheer intent of getting google hits, so that Nigel or whatever that Limey’s name is who emailed me, would email me back and see JUST HOW important the Savage Hippies really ARE. I mean, we have fuckin’ Milo Yiannopoulos, Yvette Felarca and Jim Goad as guests ON OUR FUCKIN’ SHOW!!! And, though we don’t get the REAL Milo Yiannopoulos, Yvette Felarca and Jim Goad on the show, we get their LIKENESSES instead. This is far more important in many cases. Like, for instance, if you’re a fan of 70s martial arts films, but were sad that Bruce Lee passed away, you were probably satisfied that you had Bruce Li, Bruce Lai and Lee Bruce to take the place of the deceased actor. Similarly OUR show features special guests Filo Yiannopoulos, Yvette Velarca and Chim Goad.

Then we send all three of them packing at about 27 minutes, and Ann decides to record the rest of the show in an underground catacomb. At this point, we discuss everything from my circumcised dick to Sharon Osbourne’s finding it amusing when a man had his severed dick go down a garbage disposal to something else that probably has to do with someone’s dick to how some fat Nazi kid can’t find a gurl to sleep with him, so he has to play with his dick and stalk and dox Ann. David isn’t on this episode, and I’m SURE it’s because he was sticking his dick in something.

Hey, so can we attend CPAC next year, or do the all the guys in suits have dicks up their asses and thus don’t want people who constantly talk about their dicks at their respectable conservative conference? I PROMISE that I’ve NEVER had a dick – black, white OR Asian – up my ass like that Milo fellow, though I have stuck mine in the buttholes of two lovely ladies, to whom I was monogamously pledged to in my mid-20s.

Oh, and SPOILER ALERT: ANN “I DON’T TRUST HIM ON FREE SPEECH, BUT HE’S AT LEAST BETTER THAN HILLARY CLINTON” STERZINGER CONCEDES IN THE LAST FEW MINUTES OF THE EPISODE THAT TRUMP IS A BAD ASS, AND EXPLAINS WHY.

For this week’s Sounds of Marshabaloosh segment we feature Solar Flare recording artists Pigs and their song “Amateur Hour in Dick City”, which not only fits the “dick” theme of this week’s episode, but is from from their second and latest album Wronger, and features guitarist/singer Dave Curran, who also plays bass in the noise-metal band, Unsane, one of my favorite bands of all time. Pigs play a mix of Zeppelin-style heavy rock with a hardcore edge, delivering brutal bloozy and heavy riffs, a killer groove and harsh vocals. Oh, and Curran is a big-time fan of Thomas Sowell, so that gives him about fifty-bajillion points ’round these parts. Check out “Amateur Hour in Dick City” here.

The song at the end is “The Diet Has Failed” by Yesticles, and I did the art, which is why it sucks.

Savage Hippie Episode 34 – The Swastika Killed the Comedy Star

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I was thinking of calling the latest episode of the Savage Hippie podcast “Brokedick Mountain” based upon one of this episode’s conversation pieces, in which I tell Ann about the horrific possibility of a man snapping his boner during sexual intercourse – it’s not THAT common, but it’s certainly possible if a girl is riding you cowboy style, your dick falls out and she lands on it wrong, so there’s more incentive to avoid having sloppy, drunk sex – but then I realized that I just made a JOKE out of something that we VERY BLATANTLY say ISN’T funny.

And bless Ann’s sweet, man loving/anti-misandrist soul, she AGREED that it’s not funny – unlike, say Sharon Osbourne, who laughed uproariously on The Talk at a man getting castrated and have his penis go down the garbage disposal. But doesn’t that make me a hypocrite? I JUST said that broken dicks aren’t funny, and then I go and make a joke about a broken dick utilizing the title from that stupid movie about the fag cowboys, that was directed by some Chink or something? Hint: my use of coarse, insensitive racial language is a teaser for us talking about how the left gets a pass to use this same kind of language because they don’t “mean it”, while people like us allegedly really do. See, you have to know what a comedian, musician or author stands for BEFORE you can enjoy his/her/its work because God forbid you enjoy something by someone who stands for something that you don’t.

Where the fuck was going with this? Oh yeah… while the first half of this episode is about sex, depravity, the godawful Yvette Felarca and broken dicks, the second half revolves around how the left is destroying their flimsy house of cards that they call the entertainment industry by refusing to focus on, ya know, actually entertaining people. Whether it’s Sarah Silverman, Amy Schumer, Patton Oswald or the cast of SNL, these once funny – yes, Amy Schumer had a few zingers under that wide belt of hers – comedians are so paranoid about Trump’s presidency, and in the case of Silverman, actually see swastikas in their sandwiches, that they simply refuse to do anything that doesn’t push their agenda.

The bottom line is that comedy cuts across all lines. I mean, look at us; we’ve had everyone from leftist liberals to Jew-hating neo-Nazis tell us that they find us to be a hoot. Now, what’s more of an accomplishment: playing to your own echo chamber or getting fandom from people who normally would hate yer guts? After all, we all bleed red, right David?

This week’s Sounds of Marshabaloosh features Big Business, the two piece, heavy rock combo consisting of bassist/singer Jared Warren and drummer Cody Willis with their song “Father’s Day” from their latest album, Command Your Weather. At one point, both members joined the Melvins for several albums and tours and then later added a guitarist to their lineup, but now they’re back as a power duo, and boy do they rock! Listen to the song here!

The song at the end is “The Diet Has Failed” by the Yesticles.