What are we at this point? News? Entertainment? Infotainment? We’re certainly not comedy since just about every joke we told was followed by, “huh, wait, I don’t get it. Can you explain that?”
I’m joined by Ann Sterzinger and David Cole (google ’em, you lazy bastard!) for the fifth time in the eleventh installment of the greatest podcast ever. As usual we’re all drunk and aimlessly wandering from topic to topic like the modern, ADD afflicted youth of generation Y. From the beginning, one might get the impression that we’re actually planning on discussing something serious – that being Joel Stein’s recent kvetching about how the internet is being ruined by trolls, which you can read here – but soon, we get into our usual obnoxious banter. We also sound the clarion call to all AltRighters; if the press ask you questions, give them the stupidest answers they can think of.
If you’re confused by the title, I decided to break up this episode into a part A and part B. This is obviously part A, and it includes all three of us. After David left, Ann and I recorded more stuff which I found so damn interesting, I couldn’t just let it go to waste, so that will be part B, and I will post that tomorrow. You don’t want to miss part B; Ann talks about getting sexually assaulted by David Yow of the Jesus Lizard on stage during one of their gigs.
BUT THERE’S A CATCH!!!
Being the civil folk that we are, we took extra care to make sure that this episode is 100% NOT RACIST and 0% RACIST. Because racism is a binary thing, something you either are or are not, we made it ABSOLUTELY CLEAR that we are on the “not” side. How did we do this? We installed the special “NOT racist” alarm, where we had a friendly announcer boldly point out where we exhibit non-racistness just in case there is any confusion.
In this podcast, you will hear us talk about:
- Early 20th century show-biz as David names off a bunch of old-timey actors you’ve never heard of. (note: any references to Al Jolson and Amos and Andy are done strictly to condemn them since we are NOT racist.)
- How men with big noses are the ultimate turn-on for women
- Ann’s experience at a French whorehouse
- Mention of just about every Holocaust movie in existence
- David closely examining the lyrics to “Angel of Death” by Slayer
- Ann comparing the humor of the greatest comedian of the 20th century, Yakov Smirnov, to her period
- A bunch of tasteless – but certainly not racist – jokes
The song at the end is, once again, “The Diet Has Failed” by the Yesticles.